As I said, we always gets lots of good info at our monthly support group meetings. And today did not disappoint. There were about 27 people there, made up of post and pre transplant people along with caregivers and supporters.
First for the stats I was looking for; last year there were 52 lung transplants. The most they have done in a single year is 53. So last year was great, they averaged one per week.
And the fun thing was that both the woman who had the 1st transplant of 2010 was there as was the man who came in at #52! He had his transplant on December 22nd and up until he said that I would never have guessed it. He looked like someone who was there supporting someone else, I was truly surprised. Obviously, he is doing very well.
There were several post transplant folks there, several of us pre people, on the list and waiting, and a few people who are in the process of getting onto the list. Currently, there are 40 of us on the list, waiting for the appropriate donor to provide the gift of life.
All of our meetings involve sharing experiences, concerns, and lessons learned from each aspect of our individual, and shared, experiences. We boost the morale of those who are feeling beaten down by the process of waiting, either by the advice of those who are now post transplant, or by those of us who have battled that same demon in the past and found a way to get past it, at least for the moment.
Several months ago I was so discouraged myself that I told Clay I wasn't going to go to another support group, that we have attended enough already, I just wanted this process to end. And as I was explaining to a woman today, it really doesn't matter if you decide to have a hissy-fit or not, it doesn't change anything, the wait doesn't suddenly end, the call doesn't miraculously come because you've had enough.
And then she said something that I have said so many times myself, that part of my "lesson" out of all this is to be forced to learn patience. And I explained to her how I had actually entertained that thought for a number of years myself. I do believe that there are lessons to be learned in everything we experience. But there came a time when I just had to finally admit learning patience thru this process is just hogwash! I'm no more patient today than I was 9 years ago! I'm being forced, and the key word here is "forced," to tolerate this process - because I have no choice - but I certainly am not patient with it.
Patience would denote some type of acceptance, an understanding, a feeling of peace, and let me state right now that I have none of that! The person who has evolved enough to gain patience and acceptance from this process is someone I have yet to grow into. I feel that I have been forced to learn tolerance, not patience, of a situation I cannot change, control, or escape. We will ride this thru to the end , regardless of the outcome, but I'm not seeing any sign of "acceptance" here.
What these meetings do is to remind each of us that we are all dealing with the same issues, we ride our own private roller coasters but we have the same highs and lows. And we hopefully get to be one of those people who gets to come back to the group as a "post" and tell all the "pre" people to maintain their hope, that when all the waiting is behind them that it will seem like just a blink of an eye, that it will all be worth it. Which is what we hear also at each meeting, and that continues to give us hope. Today did not fail either.
The last stat that I was looking for was to find out how many, if any, transplants have occurred this year so far. We always like know that surgeries are happening even if it isn't us on the table, ya know? It means that we are getting that much closer. At the beginning of the meeting we were told there have been no transplants. Midway thru the meeting however, we learned that one of the "pre" people from the group actually was being taken into the operating right then for his transplant! How exciting! The only way it could have been better is if it had been us. But hey, we're that much closer now, right?
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